Infertility, What To Say?

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There are plenty of ways to support a friend who is trying to conceive. Read on for our helping tips on what to say to someone who's trying to get pregnant.

Recent research by Proceive along with Mummy Pages highlights how women feel when they are asked are they are trying for a baby.

The hardest part of the conception journey reported by our mums-to-be is when people enquire if they are ‘trying’ or by reminding them that their biological ‘clock is ticking’ (33%), when their friends make their own baby announcements (31%), and seeing pregnant women (18%). These statistics are hard facts but for each statistic there is a person behind these very real and raw emotions, guilt, grief and jealousy are difficult emotions to deal with. As a friend or family member of someone who is trying to conceive its important to be as supportive as possible and not be too problem focused in your approach.

Fertility is a deeply personal experience and while some couples will openly speak about their struggles, others prefer to remain private and the key thing is to always be respectful and avoid pushing for too much information. Let them come to you and offer a listening ear and if necessary, a shoulder to cry on. We always remember the people who were there for us during difficult times in our lives so its important to bring some positivity and support to their situation where you can.

HERE ARE SOME TIPS TO HELP

  1. If your friend starts talking about trying for a baby, listen and make them feel you are interested. Only give advice if asked.
  2. Then don’t keep asking them how are things going – they have confided in you and will continue to do so in their own time – look out for signs they want to talk.
  3. Don’t minimise their thoughts – don’t say ‘there are worse things happening in the world’ – this is their world now. Comparison is relative. try and put yourself in their shoes, and treat them how you would like to be treated.
  4. Encourage them to relax and to enjoy their relationships – you can arrange relaxing things to do and arrange couples night out. It is important not to focus too much on trying to get pregnant, aim to support them in a way where you can fit into their life effortlessly, knowing they can confide in you if they choose to do so.

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